Dear Unable,
Sometimes we are so hurt by others that we simply are not able to forgive them. Yet, the Bible says "forgive each other" (Ephesians 4:32); and that if we don’t forgive others, then neither will God forgive us. (Matthew 6:15) So, what are we to do?

First, we need to realize that forgiveness is not for the benefit of the individual who hurt you, so much as it is for your benefit.

Unforgiveness will hurt you more than it will hurt the person who offended you.

God’s word says that "offenses will come" (Matthew 18:7). The ultimate issue is, how will you respond when they do come?

One key to success in the area of forgiveness is found in Ephesians 5:12, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age.".

Our battle is not against people, even though it may appear that way sometimes. The spirits of darkness USE people, work through people, to try to hurt you. But, if you can separate the person from the demonic spirit at work against you, you will win!

Lift that person who has done you wrong up to God. Tell God you forgive that one, even though you may not feel it in your heart just yet; and let HIM deal with that person.

Meanwhile, you go to battle in the spirit realm against the enemy of envy, anger, slander, rage, or whoever was attacking you, and destroy him with the sword of the spirit and the blood of Jesus!

Once you have done this, you will be FREE to walk once again in the power, provision, and blessing of God. Satan will have lost his hold, and you will have increased the anointing on your life.

When we make the decision to remain in 1 Corin. 13 no matter what the cost, the enemy is powerless against us!

If your unforgiveness has gone on for so long that a root of bitterness has sprung up inside of you, then you must repent and ask God in His mercy and grace, to forgive that person through you. It’s His forgiveness, not yours, that will free you. All you have to do is be willing.